Miles, 10, reflects on 2020: ‘I felt scared of life’

2020 challenged how we look at the world. That goes for kids, too.

Just ask Gerald Donaldson, a family support worker at Leschi Elementary in Seattle.

This year, he watched kids puzzle though tough issues, from the killing of George Floyd to a heated election. He also sees how it can affect their mental health.

We asked Donaldson to interview students about what stood out for them or hit close to home. They give us their kids’ view of the world — not always reality — but how they size things up.

This interview with fifth-grader Miles Jenkins, age 10, has been condensed and edited for clarity.

How do you feel about the outcome of the election?

I feel pretty good because Joe Biden won. And yeah, I think that he is a good person and he cares about Black people.

Do you see the importance of voting? When you turn 18, are you going to register to vote?

Maybe.

Why maybe?

Because if a bad president sees it, you never know, they might just come and kill you. A bad person just might kill you. You never know.

Just looking at you, and I know you pretty well, it seems like that last question had you a little stressed. Leading into the election, how did you feel?

My body felt weird once when one of my friends told me that Donald Trump was a bad person – that he was racist and stuff. I was like, ‘Oh shoot,’ and my body was feeling weird, and I felt nervous. And I was like, ‘I hope he doesn't kill more black people.’

We already lost George Floyd. I saw it on my phone on the news, and I was like, ‘George Floyd got killed?’ I was like, ‘Who kills him though?’ I was thinking a white person might have killed him because you know, some white police officers, and like Donald Trump, are racist and stuff.

Do you get nervous going outside sometimes, especially after that happened?

Yeah, I thought I was probably gonna get killed. I remember when I said that I felt I felt scared of life. But then my mom said, ‘Don't feel scared of life, and you're not gonna really get killed.’ So then I wasn't really scared. I faced my fear.

Was it hard to sleep at night?

Yeah, I will be waking up at like 1 or 12 in the morning and I will get cereal at that time. I’d stay up until actual morning, stay up until like school.

We want to go outside and march – I never did it before. I just wanted to know what it felt like walk around be like, ‘Black Lives Matter!’ I don't really care if it's five hours because I want Black people to feel safe and feel comfortable to be in public. We want to vote for a Black neighborhood.

Miles, I appreciate your time. Things will get better. It really bothers me when I see someone your age — or anybody — have to worry about going outside. And you shouldn't have to wake up in the middle of the night worried about that either, man. It's just not healthy.

Take care of yourself.

You can find resources for family conversations about race, police violence and Black Lives Matter at Families of Color Seattle (FOCS).